Accountability Teachers
Posted by Jim Bearden on Tue, Oct 27, 2009 @ 01:46 PM
Have you heard this one: "When the student is ready, the teacher appears"? Reflecting back on my years at the University of Texas I can tell you that--ready or not--teachers appeared at almost every one of my scheduled classes, even the ones that kicked off at 8am on Mondays. My readiness--or lack thereof--seemed to have little impact on when or if teachers would appear. Could it have been that I misunderstood what the saying meant?
As hard as that might be for your to believe, that was apparently the case. It's only in recent years that I've come to realize that "teacher appears" has nothing to do with who or what shows up in my life, and everything to do with what I notice. Learning life lessons is an inside-out phemomenon; real learning will not occur until the student "is ready". The topic on which I'm focusing in this series of articles provides an excellent example of this inside-out phemomenon at work.
After years of writing and speaking about Personal Accountability, I realize that I have been "called" to teach something I desperately need to learn. Apparently I'm ready, because teachers are appearing, often in airports.
In a previous blog entry I compared the two perspectives most of us use when processing (assigning meanings to) the people, situations & circumstances we encounter. The Victim Perspective is based on the belief that our feelings are the emotional consequences of what happens "out there" (the people, etc. that we encounter). The alternative, Accountable Perspective, is fueled by the belief that our feelings are the emotional consequences of the mental choices we make (our thoughts) about what heppens "out there".
Back to my airport "classrooms", where I encounter plenty of people, situations & circumstances that differ--often significantly--from what I would prefer. For example, there's the joy of finding myself in the security line behind people who have no clue as to what they can and cannot wear or carry through the metal detector. Who would've thought that rodeo belt buckles, cell phones or ten pounds of jewelery would set off the alarm? And then there's the relief of finally boarding an airplane only to be told that "mechanical issues" have been detected and there will be a "slight delay" while maintenance is called. The only time my second flight leaves on time is when my connecting flight is delayed, even "slightly".
Those and dozens of other airport episodes provide me with opportunities to consider and try an alternative to my old Victim Perspective; they can be--if I'm ready--my teachers. One of the things I've learned is that that I have not been a passive participant in my victimhood. On the contrary, I've been the creator of the drama and suffering I have attributed to what happens "out there". Using the Victim Belief (my feelings are the emotional consequences of what happens "out there"), I've apparently established many "rules" for what and must not happen in order for me to be OK or happy.
In my next entry I'll offer some thoughts about the barriers to our happiness, and the creators of those barriers. If you'd like a preview of that last part, all you'll need is a mirror.